It can buy a House

But not a Home

It can buy a Bed

But not Sleep

It can buy a Clock

But not Time

It can buy you a Book

But not Knowledge

It can buy you a Position

But not Respect

It can buy you Medicine

But not Health

It can buy you Blood

But not Life

It can buy you Sex

But not Love

So you see, money isn't everything.

And it often causes pain and suffering.

I tell you all this because I am your Friend.

 I am your Friend,

And as your Friend,

I want to take away your pain and suffering...

So send me all your money

and I will suffer for you.

 CASH ONLY PLEASE